Confidence for me is listening to your intuition, to what you need, and then acting on it. 

There is a lot going on in the world right now and it can leave you paralysed. When the Roe vs Wade case was overturned it left me confused – how could a woman’s right and decision about her body be taken away from her like this? It made me angry! I sat with the anger all day, reading and re-reading the information shared online. 

Then it struck me, I had to turn my anger into action. 

What I’m learning as a confidence coach is that I also have to be an activist. Because as a confidence coach I am a champion of women and confidence isn’t just about the internal self-doubt that we feel. 

There are two concepts at play when it comes to confidence; external issues (discrimination, bias, gender pay gap, confidence gap, glass ceiling, glass cliff, poor work-family policies) and internal confidence issues. However, the internal confidence issues are actually the internalised impact of generations of inequalities. This leads to behaviours that keep women safe in environments they have no legal, financial or political power. These behaviours include conflict avoidance, self-censoring, people-pleasing, tentative speech and action or what we might term as low or no confidence. (Source: Playing Big, Tara Mohr) 

It’s important we are aware of the systems at play keeping us small so we can take steps to speak up. The first time I realised that confidence wasn’t just a ‘me problem’ was reading this article.

Confidence isn’t about fixing us – it’s about listening to what we know to be right and then speaking up. It’s about noticing when it’s an imagined fear that keeps us from moving forward or if it’s a system that is keeping us fearful. 

As a confidence coach, I feel more determined than ever to support women on their confidence journey and a huge part of that includes continuously educating myself and sharing those resources along the way. 

We need more women speaking up, leading businesses and designing policies so we can begin to change the systems that unfairly discriminate against marginalised groups. 

Here are five ways you can turn your anger into action: 

• Join a not-for-profit to support the cause – Fawcett society – The Fawcett Society is the UK’s leading membership charity campaigning for gender equality and women’s rights at work, at home and in public life. 

• Become a member of your local party – by joining your local party you can support their agenda. They hold monthly meetings with local constituents which will allow you feedback on important topics.

• Gentle activism – Pregnant then Screwed holds an annual march to raise awareness for parental rights. Peaceful activism generates media coverage which raises awareness of the topic at hand.

• Workplace policies – if you’re in a leadership position within a business do you have the power to inform or change the policies you currently have in place for the better? If you’re not in a leadership position who can you speak with to share your suggestions?

• Stand for your local council or electoral party – this allows you to affect change from the top down. ElectHer supports women looking to stand for elections through workshops, training programs and mentorship. 

Since the Roe v Wade case, I have become a member of the Fawcett Society and signed up to take part in Pregnant Then Screwed’s annual march. I’m looking forward to attending some of the ElectHer workshops and continuing to educate myself and challenge myself to take action. 

From someone who has believed for a long time that I have no voice. I do. And so do you!